10 Deadlines Only a Librarian Would Understand

Deadline Comic

Image by Cartoon Resource

 

For librarians, deadlines invite a special chance to embrace the sometimes absurd—but always rewarding—task of meeting patrons’ unique and changing needs.

Here are 10 deadlines that only a librarian can fully understand.

 

1. Buy $100,000 worth of books in three days—but only titles NOT available in the U.S.

Overwhelmed with Books

Spanish Language Selector Nerissa Moran: “My funniest book deadline would be buying at the book fair in Guadalajara. Talk about a rush order!”

 

2. Become a master on The Masters as fast as humanly possible.

Golf Academy

Richard Hallman, M.Ln.: “Way back when I was a news librarian, we had many deadline requests.” Here’s one Richard remembers well: “Find out everything you can, as fast as you can, about everyone who’s a member of Augusta National Golf Club, AKA ‘The Masters’ golf club.”

 

3. Order at least 1,000 books per day.

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Fern Hallman, M.Ln.: “This was back in the day, before Bibz and the World Wide Web (1988), ordering an average of 1,000 books per day for new library branches in Atlanta.”

 

4. Give children a library tour of a building you’re completely unfamiliar with.

Tour Guide Border

Gwen Vanderhage, MLIS: “The only crazy deadline I have faced would be: Show up as a substitute librarian at a branch and find out I need to take school kids on a tour in half an hour—but I’ve never been in this building before!”

 

5. Set up a camera to welcome students to school on live TV—with NO prior experience.

TV Studio Kid

Suzanne Hawley, MLS: “I was hired to open a new school… My attention was solely focused on unpacking and organizing the collection on the new shelves, as well as managing the set-up of computers in the library… The principal mentioned to me that I would also oversee a TV studio. Late on the Friday before the first week of school, she told me she expected to welcome students live on TV for their first day. I Had NO idea how to operate ANYTHING in a TV studio. Wearily, I unpacked the camera and tried, without luck, to figure out how it sent signals to the classrooms. Never underestimate a librarian! The principal was seen on the TVs in every classroom at 9 a.m. the first day of school.”

 

6. Find a way to wheel a TV downstairs for a group of toddlers—while the elevators are down.

Elevator Out Of Order

There is no limit to the lengths to which a librarian will go to help little ones gain a literary edge. Desperate times sometimes call for creativity. Luckily, librarian ingenuity often strikes at the eleventh hour. Never bet against a librarian under pressure.

 

7. Find 26 wine corks and make a pumpkin out of them. Post-haste.

Winr Cork Pumpkin

Autumn opens the door to all kinds of unique opportunities for librarians. And that means unique challenges. Programs like Wine-Cork Pumpkin Making provide a chance to feature special activities for adults, giving them a new excuse to visit the library.

 

8. Get told you have to create an escape room in time for the library’s grand reopening—and on a shoestring budget.

Escape Room

Escape rooms challenge those within to use problem-solving skills and sometimes motor skills to successfully unlock a door and emerge with a sense of accomplishment. Such a program, with adult supervision provided, could benefit library goers. Organizing the event, though? That’s a different challenge altogether!

 

9. Learn everything you can about ska, starting yesterday.

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Maybe a fellow librarian was going to lead a program on ska featuring instruments the young attendees could make themselves. Unfortunately, she’s come down with a nasty bug and asked you to fill in. So you dive in and get to work. Librarians are masters of the impossible.

 

10. Dress up as a children’s book character when the person scheduled to play that character suddenly cancels.

Sailor Costume

There’s a unique adrenaline that comes with undertaking such a substantial feat with little to no prep time. But nothing beats putting a smile on someone else’s face or eliciting giggles.

 

This is just a sampling of the quirky obstacles librarians often face. Odds are, you have your own fun anecdote about a library deadline no one else would understand. We hope some of these have brought a smile to your face. Remember, you’re not alone!

Is it Time to Eliminate Overdue Fines?

By Fern Hallman, M.Ln.

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I have been a library user my whole life. My mom took us to the library every week, and kept perfect track of all of the books we borrowed. We were never late. I won’t say we were afraid of the local librarians, but we certainly understood that the library was a great service and that we should cooperate fully with the rules. However, the rules were not always easy for those with limited resources, like families with unreliable transportation or personal issues. Also, to use a watered-down cliché, THINGS HAPPEN. Maybe you left a book in a hotel or a taxi, and were unable to confess at the library. Would this go on your permanent record? Will this prevent you from ever visiting the library again?

Take a look at this map from the Urban Libraries Council. It shows a strong national movement for the elimination of library fines. While some libraries see the fines as a revenue stream, in many cases the fine money just goes back into the city or county general fund and does not directly benefit the library. This study from Library Journal, perhaps the most scientific one available, notes that only 15% of fines collected nationally by public libraries is spent on library materials. A little more unscientifically, you may take into account that libraries incur labor costs when they track and collect fines, and that some libraries even pay collection agencies to collect fines.

According to one perspective, fines are a useful way to teach and promote personal responsibility, while others feel that it’s more important to encourage reading and forego the morality. You can read more about the debate here.

shutterstock_741262948Some library systems have been reluctant to completely eliminate fines, choosing other creative ways to approach the issue. A different option is to eliminate fines only for youth, since fines often keep parents from allowing their children to use libraries. Libraries hope to increase access to reading and other library services to those who need them most. Not to worry—most libraries still expect books to be returned before more can be checked out.

Here are two more examples of libraries that are eliminating fees for younger patrons:

shutterstock_108717770Several libraries—including Santa Clara County Library District and Dearborn Public Library—have established programs to allow patrons to pay their debts in alternative ways, including through food donations. Perhaps this is a good way to generate goodwill and retrieve long lost library materials.

It may be too soon to determine how this issue will play out, but here’s an early result. According to news reports, the Chicago Public Library, one of the largest library systems in the country, has seen a 240% increase in book returns since the implementation of a fine-free policy. The new policy has also improved public perception of the library system and attracted new users.

Your library system may not be ready to make this move, but it’s certainly something worth thinking about.

For more on the magic we librarians create, here’s an interesting article on the role of librarians.

 

fern

Fern

Fern has worked for Brodart as a Collection Development Librarian since 1990. She also did a stint as a reference librarian in the CNN newsroom and is married to a newspaper librarian. Click here for more.